Blog - Chasing Sunrise

March 16, 2025March 17, 2025

Teen Moodiness… or Something More?

A Guide for Parents Wondering (and Worrying)

If you’re the parent of a teenager, chances are you’ve asked yourself, “Is this just typical teen behaviour… or is something more going on?”

It’s a question I hear often in counselling sessions, and it’s one worth gently exploring.

Adolescence is a time of massive transformation marked by big emotions, shifting moods, slammed doors, and moments of heartwarming connection. It’s normal. It’s messy. And it can be hard to tell what’s just part of the ride… and what might be a sign your teen is quietly struggling.

So how do you tell the difference, and what can you do to support them?

Let’s unpack it together with some practical guidance, gentle wisdom, and deep compassion for the rollercoaster that is parenting a teen.

What’s Normal Teen Moodiness?

Adolescence is a time of enormous emotional intensity. Hormonal shifts, social pressure, identity development, and a developing brain all play a role in your teen’s sometimes unpredictable moods.

It’s not unusual to see:

Emotional outbursts or sensitivity
Sleeping in more or needing downtime
Wanting more privacy or alone time
Fluctuating confidence and motivation
Eyerolls, answering back, mood swings and withdrawal

These behaviours tend to come and go. Your teen still laughs, connects, and bounces back, and that’s often the difference.

When to Lean In. Signs It Might Be More Than Moodiness

There’s no perfect checklist, but red flags deserve your attention, especially when these changes last longer than a couple of weeks or start interfering with your child’s ability to function daily.

Watch for:

A sustained drop in motivation, energy or school performance
Ongoing sadness, anxiety or irritability
Withdrawal from family, friends or activities they used to enjoy
Significant changes in sleep or appetite
Avoidance behaviours, constant self-doubt or fear of failure
Expressions of hopelessness or worthlessness
Any mention of self-harm or not wanting to be here

Trust your instincts. As their parent, you know your child best. If something feels ‘off,’ asking questions and seeking support is okay.

Gentle Conversation Starters

Sometimes, the hardest part is knowing how to open the door. You don’t need perfect words; you just need to show up with warmth, presence, and genuine care.

Here are a few ways to start:

“You’ve seemed a bit flat lately. I’m here if you want to talk.”
“I’ve noticed you’ve been quieter than usual; I just wanted to check in.”
“It’s okay not to feel okay. I’m here for you, no matter what.”
“We all have hard days, and I want you to know you’re not alone.”

Even if your teen brushes you off, your calm, non-judgemental approach matters most.

Simple Ways to Support Your Teen at Home

You don’t need to ‘fix’ everything. But you can create a steady, reassuring foundation that helps your teen feel safe, seen and supported.

Focus on connection over correction
Encourage routines (good sleep, food, movement and downtime)
Keep communication open and pressure low
Show up consistently, even if they pull away
Offer validation, not solutions like “That sounds hard” This can go a long way

Where and How to Get Help

If you’ve noticed red flags, or if you just have that quiet gut feeling that something’s not quite right, there are practical ways you can get support:

Book an appointment with your GP to discuss your concerns
Reach out to your teen’s school counsellor.
Contact a qualified counsellor or psychologist
Explore local youth mental health services or helplines in your local area

Asking for help doesn’t mean you’ve failed; it means you’re brave enough to know you don’t have to do this alone.

A Gentle Reminder

Your teen doesn’t need perfect parenting.
They need present parenting.

They need to know they’re loved, believed in, and not alone.

If you’re unsure or overwhelmed or need a sounding board, I offer compassionate 1:1 counselling for teens and parents. Don’t hesitate to reach out. You can contact me here.

In the meantime, take good care.

Megan

February 10, 2025March 16, 2025

Why Parenting Teens Feels so Hard

Parenting a teenager is one of the most challenging roles you’ll ever do. The emotional highs and lows, the push for independence, the moments of connection followed by complete shutdown…it’s exhausting, confusing, and sometimes heartbreaking. Understanding what’s happening inside our teenager’s brain can really help.

Teenagers aren’t just being difficult for the sake of it.

Teenagers’ brains are still developing well into their mid-twenties, particularly the prefrontal cortex, which is the part responsible for reasoning, impulse control, and emotional regulation. This means their emotions take charge before their reasoning brain fully catches up, and they act on impulse, react instinctively, and often struggle to regulate big feelings. Their developing brain prioritises immediate responses over careful reflection, which is why they may lash out, shut down, or make decisions that seem irrational to us.

This understanding doesn’t always make it easier in the heat of the moment, but it does give us a new lens through which to see their behaviour. When we shift from frustration to curiosity, from reacting to supporting, we create the kind of connection that keeps the lines of communication open, which is something our teenagers need now more than ever.

Meeting Your Teen Where They Are At.

So how do we parent with more understanding and less power struggle? Here are some small but effective ways we can shift our approach and in turn, strengthen connection:

Be the calm in their storm – When emotions run high, try not to match their energy. Take a deep breath, pause, and respond with curiosity rather than reactivity.
Validate their feelings – Even if something seems small to you, it might feel monumental to them. A simple “I am hearing that’s really tough for you” can help them feel heard.
Pick your battles – Not every issue needs to be a confrontation. Prioritise connection when you can.
Encourage independence, but stay available – Teens push for independence, but deep down, they want to know we are still around. Let them know you’re always there without forcing a conversation.
Take care of yourself—Parenting a teenager is emotionally demanding and can also be draining. Prioritise your own wellbeing so that you can show up for those you really care about. This might look like a walk outside, a coffee with a friend, or simply a moment to breathe before responding.

The Small Glimmers of Hope.

In the messiness of adolescence, there are moments of connection that remind us that our kids still need us, love us, and want to belong. It might be a fleeting smile, a random text, or a late-night chat when their guard is finally down. These small glimmers of hope are worth noticing and holding onto.

Parenting through this stage isn’t about getting it perfect; it’s about showing up with warmth, presence, and a willingness to understand. If you’re finding this season overwhelming, you’re not alone. Parenting is usually really hard when you’re doing a good job of it. It means you’re trying, you’re engaged, you care deeply, and you’re working hard to guide your teen through one of the most challenging stages of life.

If you’re feeling stuck or want to explore ways to support your teen (and yourself) better, I’d love to help. Don’t hesitate to reach out.

In the meantime, take care.

Megan x

May 15, 2018February 10, 2025

What Should I Eat?

Do you ever wonder what the heck you should be eating? Are you mixed up and confused about what healthy looks like? The sad truth is that much of what we eat has been processed within an inch of its life we may as well not even call it food!

The food we eat has a huge impact on our body and minds. A healthy diet is linked to a reduced risk of illness, improved mood, raised energy levels, increased productivity as well as better quality sleep. But you know all of that right? So why is it that we do what we do when we know what we know?

Well because in the busy lives we all lead, we are looking for a quick fix. The problem is we are being bombarded with the latest and greatest diet trends and this is confusing for people. Paleo, Sugar Free, Gluten Free, Dukan, 5:2, Vegan, Flexitarian…People don’t know what they should be eating! Then there is the healthy heart ticks of approval and claims on food labelling of being 99% fat free, low fat, high protein, no sugar….No wonder our heads are spinning!

I enjoy coaching people around nourishing their bodies with real, whole, colourful, simple food. I like a diet that comprises of lots of fresh fruit and vegies, legumes, wholegrains, seafood, a little meat, nuts and seeds. I hate the idea of people depriving themselves, having a blow-out then resentfully chomping on celery for the next two days. This is total craziness! Eating for good health can be simple and easy. It does not need to feel like rocket science.

Below are some really basic guidelines that are easy to follow when it comes to food;

Variety – Mix it up with different flavours, colours and textures. Aim to have a rainbow coloured plate at each meal.
Seasonal – Buy fresh locally produced fruit and vegetables. It is always the best choice for your health and your wallet.

Eat Unprocessed – Aim to buy the majority of your food fresh. Eat food the way it comes from nature as often as you can.

Watch Portion Size – Many of us simply put too much on our plate!

Hydrate Regularly – Drink plenty of water. Limit juice and soft drinks.

Don’t Skip Meals – Especially breakfast. Aim for three meals each day and a morning and afternoon snack to keep energy levels high.

Remove Temptations – Save party food for the party!

Buy Healthy Snacks – If we have our fridge full and our pantry stocked with nourishing food, we will eat nourishing food.

Relax – If you have a blow out and happen to eat the entire tub of ice cream (or whatever might be your vice) – don’t worry too much about it, just work towards getting back on track the next day. It suits me to be fairly disciplined throughout the week and then relax a bit on weekends.

For a busy woman who is time poor, preparing healthy meals for a family can be overwhelming and just another thing on our already ‘epic’ to do lists. If you are interested in learning how to create quick, simple, nourishing meals for you and your family please reach out and contact me here.

As many of you will know I am a Health Practitioner for Food Matters. I am a massive fan of the work they do and how passionately committed they are to transforming people’s health. I am thrilled to be able to share an amazing FREE resource offer with you. FMTV is like Netflix for Health. It is health inspiration anywhere, any time. You can stream hundreds of the latest docos, try a yoga class, be guided through a meditation, watch expert interviews or get some new recipe inspiration. It is brilliant!

Don’t hesitate to reach out if you have any queries, questions or just need a little support. I’d love to connect with you.

In the meantime, take great care.
Megan x

January 3, 2018November 19, 2024

Big Change Starts Small.

Big Changes Start Small

Hi there and Happy New Year!

There is something special about a New Year. It’s a new month, new beginning, new mindset, new focus, new start and new intentions. It’s full of hope and promise.

A lot of people begin the New Year by making resolutions. We’ve all been there. We make a promise to lose weight, exercise more, cut down on alcohol or spend more quality time with family. We start the year with great intentions, but then we quickly relapse into old habits. Why is it so hard to stick to those New Year’s resolutions?

For some of us, 2017 was a great year of health, wellness, enjoyment and fulfilment. Sadly, for others, this eluded them yet again. The reality is unless you do something you’ve never done, you are going to get what you’ve always got. A bit like Einstein’s definition of insanity;

“Doing the same things over and over again and expecting different results.”

To get new results you have to be open and willing to try something new. If you are sick and tired of nothing changing then take some action. So many of us make the mistake of embarking on a total life overhaul and then after a short time lose motivation or run out of steam and end up feeling hopeless and more overwhelmed. The key is starting small.

Below is a list of some small, simple things you can do today to improve your health; and when put into practice consistently will transform your wellness.

Top 5 Healthy Habits:

1. Move More. There is no superfood or ‘pill’ with as much holistic benefit for wellbeing as movement. Just 30 minutes of moderate exercise each day will offer you massive benefits for both your body and mind. Maximise your success by doing an activity that keeps you motivated, interested and that you enjoy. Consistency is the key. Some is better than none and more is better than less!

2. Drink More Water. Not only will you feel better, you will look better and perform better. Many of us do not drink enough. There is a simple formula .04 x weight (kg) will give you an idea of how much you should be consuming each day in litres. More than you think and you will need to drink more than this is you are exercising. You will know if you have consumed enough throughout the day because your urine will be clear or straw-coloured.

3. Ditch the Diet. They don’t work and can in fact harm our health. A healthier approach to weight management is to not diet but to realise our body wants us to be healthy and comfortable. Strive for plenty of fresh, colourful and unprocessed food. Ideally we should be aiming to eat 5 serves of vegetables per day and around 2 serves of fruit. Combining this with lean protein, legumes, wholegrains, nuts and seeds makes an excellent choice.

4. Go to Bed Earlier. Sleep affects our mental and physical health enormously. It assists our ability to function well and make good decisions throughout the day. Lack of sleep is a very common problem for ‘busy women’. We need to be aiming for between 7 – 9 hours each night. Research suggests that for sufficient deep, restorative sleep we should be in bed no later than 10:30pm.

5. Practise Gratitude. When we are ‘busy’ it is easy for us to get bogged down, complain a lot and feel sorry for ourselves. Being grateful can put us in a very different state of mind. Taking some time out to be mindful of things we are grateful for (big or small) can really help us appreciate what we have. Start a new ritual of writing down or saying out loud each day three things you are grateful for. Watch your perspective change.

So rather than ‘eating the elephant’ start by breaking it all down into small, manageable and bite sized chunks. Build with baby steps. If you start to doubt yourself, remember that this year has never happened before. It is a blank slate. A fresh start. Make it exactly what you want and don’t look back.

Wishing you a healthy and happy start to the New Year. x

October 17, 2017November 19, 2024

Mindfulness. What is it?

We find ourselves in a heightened state of stress, anxiety and overwhelm more and more. We are multi-tasking, chaotic role-juggling and flitting from one thing to the next at a crazy pace. With our minds being pulled in so many different directions every day, it becomes almost impossible to focus fully on what we are doing in the moment. Lack of sleep, inability to focus, less time to connect both with ourselves and with others and rushing…always rushing! For so many of us, this has become our version of ‘normal.’

Mindfulness. What is it?

You’ve probably heard of mindfulness, but what is it really? Basically, it is the act of paying attention, in detail and on purpose to what is going on in the present moment. It means waking up out of autopilot and taking the steering wheel of our attention again.

Science says.

Even though the effectiveness of mindfulness is underpinned by neuroscience, we continue to resist slowing down and taking time out. But science states that when we practice mindfulness our brains change. The frequency of waves shift from a heightened state of fight or flight and into a frequency that supports creativity, problem solving, clarity and calm

The impacts of an unsettled mind have an enormous impact on our bodies. When our minds are out of balance, our bodies will follow and an unbalanced mind will compromise our ability to experience optimal health, no matter how well we eat or how much we move.
Modern day life has caused us to deviate from our natural state of mind. The natural mindset is still, present, calm, aware and focussed. For us to return towards this way we have to consciously, deliberately and mindfully choose to live another way. With mindful awareness we have the ability to nurture our minds, slow down our thoughts and experience a much greater sense of wellbeing.

Mindfulness can be practised by anyone.

Thanks to research, mindfulness is no longer considered ‘hippy woo woo’ or confined to health retreats and ashrams. Today, mindfulness is practiced by millions of people all over the world. Now there are so many ‘mindful’ activities that we can try. These activities aren’t complicated or time consuming. They don’t require you to sit cross-legged on the floor. In- fact mindfulness can take the form of a completely informal practice like going for a walk, brushing your teeth, stretching…Any routine or activity can be made into a mindful practice when you bring your full attention to it.

The quality of our thoughts are fundamental to all aspects of our wellbeing and our life and therefore it’s so important to carve out space in our busy lives to take care of our minds like we do the other parts of our body. If you haven’t already, why not find out for yourself what it’s all about? If you are interested in learning more, please don’t hesitate to reach out.

August 31, 2017November 18, 2024

Self-Care is not Selfish.

Self-care is not Selfish

So how are you…really?

Every day, I see the crazy, messy, demanding, no down-time, don’t let anyone see what this is really like truth people are living. I also see people searching for something different. Searching for something they believe is unattainable. Lives that they can enjoy, space to breathe, time to live and not just exist.

I have lived it and know it to be true. I am hardwired with a massive tendency to overload myself and overcommit. I have very high expectations of myself, three very busy children, coupled with a husband who travels for work and I run my own business so I know intimately, the juggle and the struggle that we women face. For a long time I spent my days over scheduling, trying to do it all, be it all and have it all. I was running on adrenalin and juggling lots of balls (pretty well) but I was missing basic opportunities for connectedness and happiness. I started to burn out.

So I stepped back. Big time. I had to make some changes that would better support me and my family. What I have learned over many years is that for me to thrive – at work and at home I need be very intentional and deliberate about supporting my wellbeing and investing in myself each and every day.

For so many women there is this sense of hopelessness around it all – that we are living a losing battle of just trying to stay on top of things. But here’s the thing…It is absolutely possible to live a life you love…to live a life that is full and stimulating and fulfilling but that is not panicked and rushed and chaotic.

Over time I have learned ways that have enabled me to take my wellbeing to a whole new dimension. As a result, I am more present, calm, energized and fulfilled. This didn’t just happen. It’s been a slow burn. My non-negotiables each day are good nutrition, exercise, enough sleep and meditation. By practicing these self-care rituals, I am much better at managing and embracing the busyness of life.

How to make ‘self-care’ actually happen.
It can be quite a challenge to find time for ourselves. Unless you plan it – ‘me time’ can easily fall off the to-do list.

Commitment to self. Getting over the idea that ‘self-care’ is selfish and that in fact it’s a necessary dimension of your wellbeing is the first step. When we are tired, stressed and pulled in too many directions, it is impossible to give our best to all that we must accomplish.
What is wasting time? Do you check your emails constantly? Answer personal calls in the middle of a work-day? Spend time mindlessly scrolling through social media? If this sounds like you, perhaps it’s time to prioritise your responsibilities and gain more time that way.
Learn to say “no”. Practise makes perfect but it is okay to say no to things that you don’t really want to do, need to do and don’t value.
Plan for it. Unless you plan for it, in our very busy, over committed lives it is likely to fall off the ‘to do’ list. We have to be pro-active about fitting it in. Schedule it like you would an appointment or a meeting.
Commit to a minimum of 10 – 20 minutes a day. Start off small. Do something (or nothing) that you enjoy and that allows you to let go of responsibility. Everyone has 10 minutes.
Create a daily ritual. This might be a bath, going for an evening walk or getting up early to meditate or have a quiet cup of tea alone. Build it into your day and make it something you look forward to.

No matter what ‘self-care’ means for you, it shouldn’t be at the bottom of your ‘To Do’ list. It is something we should be doing to stay healthy and happy. It’s basic. It’s fundamental.

So what can you do today to improve your self-care?
If you have a hunch that you’re not quite nailing it – I’d love to hear from you. I work with clients just like you to improve their wellness with simple strategies and routines to regain clarity and control, find balance in their day and develop healthy habits towards experiencing a more fulfilling life. Contact me here and lets have a chat.

July 13, 2017November 19, 2024

Chaos to Calm

Chaos to Calm

Do you feel like you are rarely on top of things? Are you overcommitted and overwhelmed? Do you feel like you are coming up short when it comes to doing enough, giving enough and being enough? Are you over it?

We all have these moments where in the chaotic craziness of life we lose ourselves for a moment. We can very easily get caught up in everyone else’s needs and ignore our own. See I used to live like this – all the time. This insane rushing and overcommitting was my version of ‘normal.’ It was my standard practise. But I was strung out and exhausted. Not any-more!

What I actually crave now is Space. Uncomplicated. Calm.

I knew I had to take stock. None of us are perfect, no matter what persona we project. We all have highs and lows where we need support, love, and a plan to move forward.

So why am I sharing all of this with you? I am hearing more and more from friends and clients who are crazily busy and caught up in the hustle, the juggle and the struggle and don’t know how to press pause and get off the roller coaster. People who are desperately seeking to step away from the busyness. So I thought I’d share a snippet of some of the things that work for me and hope that some of the strategies might resonate with you.

Be Real.

It’s okay to not be indestructible all the time and to feel flat, overwhelmed and disconnected. A lot of the time it will pass. Helping yourself through it is the important part.

Reconnect with your Vision.

Get deliberate about the life you want to create for yourself. When you live life true to your values and integrity, it becomes pretty clear when you are no longer in alignment. Getting clear about what is no longer serving you, your purpose or your wellbeing is super important. That feeling that just doesn’t feel right. Listen to it. Honor it.

Move.

It doesn’t mean you have to do a high intensity sweat session. Make the time to simply move your body. Get outside, breathe in the fresh air and gain a fresh perspective.

Detox – your body and your life.

Let the good in and let go of the things that aren’t working for you. Maybe you need a social media detox, or to take a good look at your relationship/friendships? We could really benefit by surrounding ourselves with people who genuinely love us for who we are, support us and genuinely care about us. On a lighter note you might like to clear the clutter. Get rid of the messiness, the paper piles, the out of date food in the pantry, the clothes you never wear…Space feels good. And the mind calms with the less clutter there is.

Routines.

I love routines and rituals. They help set me up for a good day. They are habit and they are the non-negotiable parts of my day, the stuff that I enjoy and I know makes me feel good. It’s simple and takes out hundreds of decisions every day that are unnecessary and can zap time and energy.
Engage your ‘Dream Team’. Lean in and lean on your support network….partner, family, friends. Call on your tribe. There is no beating authentic connection and sharing quality time with the people you love. A walk, a coffee, a hug, a chat, a cry or a laugh with them can be the greatest lift.

Plan a Break.

Everybody needs a little time away. Getting away from the everyday norm is essential for our coping, our health and wellbeing. If you have a family, you know that the time you have away on a holiday with them is always amazing as the focus is on enjoying the time together with no other distractions. Whether it is a girls weekend away or a longer holiday get it in the diary so you can have it to look forward to.

Now not for a second am I suggesting we all quit our jobs and spend our days meditating and sipping on green juice. For those of you that know me know I am driven, have a full life and love to embrace people, good times and new opportunities. What I am talking about is to stop needing everything to be bigger and better. Simplify, slow down and realign to create your own calm and happy place.

If you are over it and overwhelmed and stuck in a fog, it’s okay, there is another way. The reality is it starts with awareness and then small, deliberate, intentional steps. Start with focusing on what matters most to you…

If you know you need to make some changes but don’t know where to start, connect with me here for a complimentary ‘check in’ and let’s work out a plan together. Let me support you to connect more deeply, breathe more freely and live more simply.

June 1, 2017November 19, 2024

Tired all the time? Get some sleep.

Tired all the Time? Get some Sleep

So how did you sleep last night? What about the night before that? Did you go to bed before 10pm in a cool, darkened room and sleep without waking for 8 gorgeous hours? Did you wake naturally, feeling refreshed, energised, calm and positive? No? Really? Well this sadly is the reality for a very large number of people who in fact rarely experience this. Unfortunately the complaint of “I’m exhausted all the time” has become perfectly normal. How wrong is that!

I attended a talk the other night presented by the super brain and very awesome Dr Libby Weaver ‘Sort Your Sleep – Understanding Mood, Stress and Fatigue.’ It struck me just how many of us struggle with getting enough shut eye. Anyhow, it inspired me to share a bit about how absolutely central sleep is to good health.

Too busy to sleep.
No matter how tired we are sometimes, it feels like it’s impossible to get the sleep we need. Feeling that there aren’t enough hours in the day, we look for something to cut. And sleep is an easy target. Ironically, the more tired we are, combined with the sleep we are too busy to have, the more we come unravelled…big time!

Burning out.
I can speak from personal experience when I recall a time where anything over 5 hours felt like a bonus. Waking to an alarm after minimal sleep would send my adrenalin pumping. Like a robot I would sit up, tie my laces and head out into the dark to get my exercise in before the rest of the world woke. I was totally knackered. Wired and tired! I am here to tell you that if you are getting by on minimal sleep and feel like you are coping okay then it is time to reassess. Burning out is not the necessary price for accomplishment and success.

Just getting by.
Sleep is often the first thing to go when we are busy. You think you can just ‘get by’ with five hours sleep and you’ll be fine. Right? WRONG! We need sleep to function well. It is absolutely vital for our mental, physical and emotional well-being. Getting good-quality sleep (and enough of it) should be as high on your priority list as regular exercise and a healthy diet.

Why lack of sleep is bad for our health…REALLY BAD!
There is a wealth of evidence showing that too few zzzzs can have a significant and very negative impact on our health and wellbeing. Sleep is absolutely the key to better health. Sleep affects our physical and mental health enormously. A bad night’s sleep massively impacts alertness, concentration, memory, mood and productivity. It can also lower our immunity, contribute to weight gain, affect our hormone function and increase our risk of serious disease. Without enough sleep, we may well continue to function but we certainly do not continue to function well. Sleep is the key to feeling great and functioning at your personal best.

Today we know more about the science of sleep than ever before and how important it is to every aspect of our wellbeing. However, getting enough sleep seems harder and harder. It’s also the delusion that overwork, stress and burnout are the inevitable prices we must pay in order to succeed. There are some very real medical reasons why people may not be able to achieve deep restorative sleep, so if you feel like you have ‘tried everything’ then it may be a reason to consult your GP. For most of us though there is a great deal of hope around sorting our sleep.

Here are some suggestions for getting a great night’s sleep:

Sleep in a darkened room. This supports the body’s natural hormonal patterns to send you off to sleep and keep you that way.
Get to sleep by 10pm. Most of the body’s repair work is done prior to 3am so the more sleep you can get before this time, the fresher and more vital you will feel on waking.
Switch off! Computers, televisions and phones interfere with your natural sleep hormones and affect your sleep big time. Ideally have technology free time for at least an hour before bed.
Avoid doing work for 2 hours before bed and engaging your brain in this way.
Avoid stimulants in the afternoon. Eliminating caffeine after 12pm is a good idea.
Avoid excessive alcohol. Although alcohol is a sedative, it disrupts quality of sleep by causing us to wake when our blood sugar levels start to fall.
Keep the temperature in the bedroom at a comfortable level. Don’t overheat with piles of blankets and keep some fresh air coming into the room during the night.
Find a way to relax before bed. Restorative rituals like a bath, a cup of herbal tea, a book, some light stretching or even some slow deep breathing can help to clear your mind and enable you to fall into a deeper sleep.

So how much sleep do we need?
Seven to eight hours. Most experts consider this the optimal level of sleep and it should lead you to wake feeling rested and ready for the day ahead.

So it’s about time you got some serious shut eye.
It is so important to schedule maximum (quality) sleep time for yourself if you want to start feeling amazing from the inside out. Rather than trudging through your day, wake up feeling calm, clear and rested. There is a new kind of normal – just go to bed!

I would like to challenge you to find one thing you could do differently over the next week to set yourself up for a better nights sleep. I’d love to hear what works for you. Contact me here.

May 10, 2017November 19, 2024

Are you an ‘All or Nothing’ person?

Are you an 'All or Nothing' Person?

The problem with ‘All or Nothing’ thinking is that either you’re all – or you’re nothing. There is no in-between. This approach to life can really stifle our happiness and fulfilment and tends to explode into self -criticism and feelings of hopelessness.

Letting go of extremes can really improve your health and wellness.

I get it. It can be challenging to always eat well, diligently exercise, rest enough…add this to the every-day responsibilities of working, managing a home, giving to relationships, contributing to society and being a decent human…it can be overwhelming and exhausting.

‘All or Nothing’ people swing between both ends of the extremes:

They do restrictive diets to punish themselves after indulging on a holiday.

They swear off all alcohol for ‘Feb Fast’ or ‘Ocsober’ only to participate in huge drinking sessions for the remainder of the year.
After having a row of chocolate they think, “Oh well I’ve blown it”, and so decide to eat the entire block.

They sign up for 30 days of yoga in a row to make up for 3 months of complete inactivity.

They do a green juice cleanse for a week after a weekend of indulgence and binging.

If we embraced moderation a little more in our lives we wouldn’t feel the need to turn to extreme weight loss challenges, diets and ‘detoxes’ to make up for our lifestyle.

So you miss a workout one morning because you have to be at work early or you have a row of chocolate after dinner. The thing is, missing a workout or having a piece of cake or chocolate doesn’t mean you’ve blown your whole regime. Being affected by life’s little bumps doesn’t mean you’re weak. It means you’re human.

So many clients I see are stuck in this ‘All or Nothing’ cycle. This idea that if something is not done perfectly then the pursuit is useless.

Maybe you or someone you know is like this…Before they (re)start their new diet the pantry gets cleaned out, they eat a few last-hurrah meals, drink a few last–hurrah wines. A new exercise regime may start with the same sort of enthusiasm, new active-wear and renewed promises to self of daily workouts. But if you are pressuring yourself to be perfect, it won’t be long until you decide you’re weak or that your life/family/job/whatever is conspiring to keep you out of shape. And then, you give up. You quit!

Whilst these intentions are great and we need to be scheduling time for intentional exercise and paying attention to the quality and quantity of food we eat, this ‘All or Nothing’ approach sets the bar so high that it can never be reached and in doing so, we set ourselves up to fail. Cue feelings of guilt, shame, inadequacy, restriction and feelings of hopelessness!

We need to be a little bit flexible, especially at the beginning of a lifestyle change. Yes, it’s important to make a plan and do your best to stick with it. But if you do stumble, dust yourself off. Life happens…carry on. A slip up does not need to be the undoing of our health. It is just a tiny part of the big picture.

It really is about time we start being a little kinder to ourselves for the sake of our health. Time we embraced a little more moderation instead of guiltily swinging between ‘All or Nothing’ extremes. I provide guidance towards health and lifestyle solutions for busy women. If you would like some support towards making some tweaks toward a sustainable and balanced wellness plan then contact me. I would love to help you find what feels right for you.

April 4, 2017November 19, 2024

Hyperstriving. It’s a Thing!

Hyperstriving. It's a thing!

I feel compelled to share…this concept of hyperstriving. I first met Talya Rabinovitz, a Psychologist and founder of ‘The Healthy Mind Project’ at a Wellness event late last year. Talya talked about this thing called ‘hyperstriving’ and my ears pricked up and there I was nodding along to everything she was saying… I am without doubt a recovering hyperstriver.

Talya explained that ‘hyperstriving’ (which she notes is not a clinical term or concept and could be called something else by other clinicians) is a relentless desire to achieve. It is when people align their sense of identity with achievement; that their value in this world is connected to what they do and how others see them. This concept of feeling good enough when they achieve. These people have very high expectations of themselves, they push and push and push themselves to achieve and yet when they do achieve, that feeling of elation never arrives, more this feeling and compulsion to keep striving, to keep hustling and to keep going. This thinking that maybe when I achieve this next big thing…then I’ll feel fulfilled. Except that feeling of being good enough and content enough and happy enough never arrives. Do, do, do. More, more, more!

See there is no happiness or contentment in hyperstriving. There is a real problem when our sense of worth is tied up in what we do and how others see us.

Whilst there is no valid and reliable checklist to diagnose a hyperstriver; I can say with a fair amount of certainty that so many of the women I know and the clients I see are in fact themselves ‘hyperstrivers.’ These women are smart, strong, driven, capable and switched on. These same women are wearing more hats, juggling more projects, working longer hours and taking on more responsibility than ever before. Meanwhile many of us continue to also fulfil traditional roles as home makers, nurturers, carers and partners. Add all of this to an endless list of ‘stuff’ we should be doing like exercising, eating well, having quality time with friends and family, improving ourselves and contributing to our community…There is no wonder we are overwhelmed and exhausted!

Could you be a hyperstriver? Do any of the following sound like you?

Lost your passion and purpose.
Burning out.
Relationships are suffering.
Always rushing.
Lack of satisfaction despite all the hard work.
Low energy.
Career flourishing, health diminishing.
Poor food habits.
Competing priorities.
Snappy and frustrated.
Rarely feel like you are on top of things.
Strung out and exhausted.
Daily battle to keep up.
Using coffee to warm up and alcohol to cool down.
No time to exercise.
Endless ‘To Do’ lists.
Values are no longer aligned with the life you’re living.
Always feeling like there is more to do.
Know you need to make changes but don’t know where to start.

I get you. I’ve been there. I also know with the benefit of hindsight that there is no joy or authentic, meaningful success to be found in always striving towards achieving the next big thing. Regardless of what we do or what we have, we are all precious and important. We are enough. There is real beauty, joy and happiness to be found in the ‘being’ and just letting go.

I help busy women like you achieve happier, healthier and more balanced lifestyles. With guidance, I will help you simplify and structure your ‘busy life’. We will work together to create a life that reflects what is really important to you. A life that aligns with what matters most to you. Together we will dig yourself out of the clutter. With my support, I will help you create healthy behaviours in the realms of nutrition, exercise, lifestyle, organisation and stress management. You will emerge feeling energised, inspired and empowered. You will have more time, have greater balance and feel like you are more aligned with your true self. For more information, contact me here.