#busywomen Archives - Chasing Sunrise

July 13, 2017November 19, 2024

Chaos to Calm

Chaos to Calm

Do you feel like you are rarely on top of things? Are you overcommitted and overwhelmed? Do you feel like you are coming up short when it comes to doing enough, giving enough and being enough? Are you over it?

We all have these moments where in the chaotic craziness of life we lose ourselves for a moment. We can very easily get caught up in everyone else’s needs and ignore our own. See I used to live like this – all the time. This insane rushing and overcommitting was my version of ‘normal.’ It was my standard practise. But I was strung out and exhausted. Not any-more!

What I actually crave now is Space. Uncomplicated. Calm.

I knew I had to take stock. None of us are perfect, no matter what persona we project. We all have highs and lows where we need support, love, and a plan to move forward.

So why am I sharing all of this with you? I am hearing more and more from friends and clients who are crazily busy and caught up in the hustle, the juggle and the struggle and don’t know how to press pause and get off the roller coaster. People who are desperately seeking to step away from the busyness. So I thought I’d share a snippet of some of the things that work for me and hope that some of the strategies might resonate with you.

Be Real.

It’s okay to not be indestructible all the time and to feel flat, overwhelmed and disconnected. A lot of the time it will pass. Helping yourself through it is the important part.

Reconnect with your Vision.

Get deliberate about the life you want to create for yourself. When you live life true to your values and integrity, it becomes pretty clear when you are no longer in alignment. Getting clear about what is no longer serving you, your purpose or your wellbeing is super important. That feeling that just doesn’t feel right. Listen to it. Honor it.

Move.

It doesn’t mean you have to do a high intensity sweat session. Make the time to simply move your body. Get outside, breathe in the fresh air and gain a fresh perspective.

Detox – your body and your life.

Let the good in and let go of the things that aren’t working for you. Maybe you need a social media detox, or to take a good look at your relationship/friendships? We could really benefit by surrounding ourselves with people who genuinely love us for who we are, support us and genuinely care about us. On a lighter note you might like to clear the clutter. Get rid of the messiness, the paper piles, the out of date food in the pantry, the clothes you never wear…Space feels good. And the mind calms with the less clutter there is.

Routines.

I love routines and rituals. They help set me up for a good day. They are habit and they are the non-negotiable parts of my day, the stuff that I enjoy and I know makes me feel good. It’s simple and takes out hundreds of decisions every day that are unnecessary and can zap time and energy.
Engage your ‘Dream Team’. Lean in and lean on your support network….partner, family, friends. Call on your tribe. There is no beating authentic connection and sharing quality time with the people you love. A walk, a coffee, a hug, a chat, a cry or a laugh with them can be the greatest lift.

Plan a Break.

Everybody needs a little time away. Getting away from the everyday norm is essential for our coping, our health and wellbeing. If you have a family, you know that the time you have away on a holiday with them is always amazing as the focus is on enjoying the time together with no other distractions. Whether it is a girls weekend away or a longer holiday get it in the diary so you can have it to look forward to.

Now not for a second am I suggesting we all quit our jobs and spend our days meditating and sipping on green juice. For those of you that know me know I am driven, have a full life and love to embrace people, good times and new opportunities. What I am talking about is to stop needing everything to be bigger and better. Simplify, slow down and realign to create your own calm and happy place.

If you are over it and overwhelmed and stuck in a fog, it’s okay, there is another way. The reality is it starts with awareness and then small, deliberate, intentional steps. Start with focusing on what matters most to you…

If you know you need to make some changes but don’t know where to start, connect with me here for a complimentary ‘check in’ and let’s work out a plan together. Let me support you to connect more deeply, breathe more freely and live more simply.

April 4, 2017November 19, 2024

Hyperstriving. It’s a Thing!

Hyperstriving. It's a thing!

I feel compelled to share…this concept of hyperstriving. I first met Talya Rabinovitz, a Psychologist and founder of ‘The Healthy Mind Project’ at a Wellness event late last year. Talya talked about this thing called ‘hyperstriving’ and my ears pricked up and there I was nodding along to everything she was saying… I am without doubt a recovering hyperstriver.

Talya explained that ‘hyperstriving’ (which she notes is not a clinical term or concept and could be called something else by other clinicians) is a relentless desire to achieve. It is when people align their sense of identity with achievement; that their value in this world is connected to what they do and how others see them. This concept of feeling good enough when they achieve. These people have very high expectations of themselves, they push and push and push themselves to achieve and yet when they do achieve, that feeling of elation never arrives, more this feeling and compulsion to keep striving, to keep hustling and to keep going. This thinking that maybe when I achieve this next big thing…then I’ll feel fulfilled. Except that feeling of being good enough and content enough and happy enough never arrives. Do, do, do. More, more, more!

See there is no happiness or contentment in hyperstriving. There is a real problem when our sense of worth is tied up in what we do and how others see us.

Whilst there is no valid and reliable checklist to diagnose a hyperstriver; I can say with a fair amount of certainty that so many of the women I know and the clients I see are in fact themselves ‘hyperstrivers.’ These women are smart, strong, driven, capable and switched on. These same women are wearing more hats, juggling more projects, working longer hours and taking on more responsibility than ever before. Meanwhile many of us continue to also fulfil traditional roles as home makers, nurturers, carers and partners. Add all of this to an endless list of ‘stuff’ we should be doing like exercising, eating well, having quality time with friends and family, improving ourselves and contributing to our community…There is no wonder we are overwhelmed and exhausted!

Could you be a hyperstriver? Do any of the following sound like you?

Lost your passion and purpose.
Burning out.
Relationships are suffering.
Always rushing.
Lack of satisfaction despite all the hard work.
Low energy.
Career flourishing, health diminishing.
Poor food habits.
Competing priorities.
Snappy and frustrated.
Rarely feel like you are on top of things.
Strung out and exhausted.
Daily battle to keep up.
Using coffee to warm up and alcohol to cool down.
No time to exercise.
Endless ‘To Do’ lists.
Values are no longer aligned with the life you’re living.
Always feeling like there is more to do.
Know you need to make changes but don’t know where to start.

I get you. I’ve been there. I also know with the benefit of hindsight that there is no joy or authentic, meaningful success to be found in always striving towards achieving the next big thing. Regardless of what we do or what we have, we are all precious and important. We are enough. There is real beauty, joy and happiness to be found in the ‘being’ and just letting go.

I help busy women like you achieve happier, healthier and more balanced lifestyles. With guidance, I will help you simplify and structure your ‘busy life’. We will work together to create a life that reflects what is really important to you. A life that aligns with what matters most to you. Together we will dig yourself out of the clutter. With my support, I will help you create healthy behaviours in the realms of nutrition, exercise, lifestyle, organisation and stress management. You will emerge feeling energised, inspired and empowered. You will have more time, have greater balance and feel like you are more aligned with your true self. For more information, contact me here.

March 16, 2017November 19, 2024

Are You A Busy Martyr?

Are you a busy Martyr?

Are you too busy taking care of everyone else to focus on you?

We all want to feel well. We want to feel energetic, glowing, joyful and alive. However with modern demands and conflicting priorities life can be a bit chaotic. We seem to be pushing, striving, hustling and rushing. So healthy and well isn’t always easy to achieve, especially when we are so busy looking after everybody else. Looking after ourselves is often the last thing we focus on.

Busy is not an excuse.

So a very common excuse people make for not taking care of themselves is that they are too busy taking care of everybody else. They justify neglecting themselves in exchange for caring for others. Now this may sound noble, it may even appear selfless and giving; BUT it really is a means of self-sabotage.

You can’t pour from an empty cup.

If you are used to putting others first it’s hard to prioritise yourself, and not feel guilty about it. Consider an aeroplane when we are told to put on our own oxygen masks first before attending to others. The idea clashes with our instinct right? What does it really mean? Simply put: If you don’t put your mask on first, you won’t be there for all those other people when they need you. You will be unconscious.

The same applies to us. Our natural tendency is to do for others, because we are caring, loving, nurturing, responsible, supportive and competent people. However, just like the oxygen mask, we need to take care of ourselves so we can effectively take care of the people we love. I say it all the time to my clients; “You can’t pour from an empty cup.” If we are overweight, stressed out and unwell due to putting ourselves at the bottom of the ‘To-Do’ list, you can’t be your best for the important people in your life. Kind of counterintuitive right?

You can manage ‘Busy.’

So if you find yourself frazzled, worn out, irritable, habitually complaining and ‘over it,’ it’s probably time to make some changes. See the thing is, it is absolutely possible to live a life you love; to live a life that is interesting, stimulating and fulfilling but that is not panicked, rushed and chaotic. Managing ‘busy’ and looking after your health is a deliberate choice. An intentional mindset. A discipline within everyone’s reach.

As a health and wellness coach I see the crazy, messy, demanding, no down-time, don’t let anyone see what this is really like truth. I also see people searching for something different. Searching for something they believe is unattainable. Lives that they can enjoy, space to breathe, time to live and not just exist.

If you would like some guidance and support to find workable solutions that fit into your busy lives…solutions that done with consistency will ensure your life becomes full of real living and great health then contact me.

Life can be so much more than just keeping your head above water.

May 24, 2016May 24, 2016

How ‘Busy’ is Hurting our Health

Women today are struggling to catch their breath. Smart, strong, intelligent women are frantic and overwhelmed with the hectic pace and demands of every-day life. ‘Busy’ is hurting our health.

The modern woman is wearing more hats, juggling more projects, working longer hours and at the same time many continue to fulfil roles as home makers, nurturers, mothers and lovers. Add all of this to an endless list of ‘stuff’ we should be doing like exercising, eating well, having quality time with friends and family, improving ourselves and contributing to our community…there is no wonder we are overwhelmed and exhausted!

Our lives have become so demanding that ‘busy’ and ‘tired’ are just accepted as the norm. We are so caught up in the ‘doing’ that we are not actually just ‘being’, and sadly this is how we are measuring our success. We are pushing, striving, working harder, thinking, planning and rushing. As a result we are losing sight of human moments, connection and our health. For what?

It’s time to get real about what’s important to us and take back control.

‘Busy’ is not something to boast about…Busy’ is making us sick. Fatigue, irritability, insomnia, anxiety, headaches and tension – all conditions related to excessive busyness. It’s time to stop catastrophising our lives, subscribing to the hype and glorifying ‘busy’. It is more important than ever to take great care of ourselves. So how do we do this without feeling like it’s just another thing on our already epic ‘to do’ lists?

Most people will say they just don’t have time. We all have time…the same time. We prioritise what we value most. So saying that you don’t have time is because you don’t value it as a priority. By carving out time (that we all have) for ourselves, we can make huge strides in other aspects for our lives that have previously drained us.

You need to ask yourself; is what you are doing now aligned with what you want for your life? If the answer is no, it’s time to reassess.

Life will always bring us challenges, set-backs, disappointments and occasionally a full blown crisis. But in amongst it all there is joy and happiness to be found. We need to wake-up and be able to enjoy the ordinary and every day, the journey, the being, the authentic, the real.

Exhaustion, stress and busyness lie between what we have and what we want. Reassessing priorities and decluttering our lives is key to creating space to create more, be more, give more, dream more and live more. This is your life. Own it.

Change is not easy, but with the right support it is possible. Don’t hesitate to contact me if you would like to learn more or find out how we can work together to help you regain control, find balance and develop healthy habits towards experiencing a more fulfilling life.